Like a Delicious Edible, The Green Knight Lingers Long After Its First Impression

Green Knight - Looper.jpg

Let's talk about the movie The Green Knight, shall we? Mein Gott, what an extraordinary event it is! I was blown away by everything in the movie, from the acting to the settings and sound effects to the costumery to the transformative storytelling. I knew not to expect a Marvel-like experience. Knew? HOPED WITH ALL MY BEING! I'm so burned out on superheroexplosionfreneticism in films, and if you're anything like me, I know you understand. So tell me who else has seen it? What did you think? I can't wait to see it again to piece more of the mystery together and revel in all I saw and missed once more.

Image credit: https://www.looper.com/406712/breaking-down-the-trailer-for-the-green-knight/

Book Review: Smoke Gets In Your Eyes by Caitlin Doughty

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes & Other Lessons from the CrematorySmoke Gets in Your Eyes & Other Lessons from the Crematory by Caitlin Doughty
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I haven't read (or in this case listened to an audiobook of) a story more insightful, funny, poignant, revealing, and informative in maybe ever, and especially not about the topic of death. Caitlin Doughty's stories are absolutely fascinating, at times hilarious, and often profound. I first heard her on a podcast about working in a crematory, and thanks to just how much fun her stories about the death industry come across, thanks to her natural genius of storytelling (and despite death being practically the dictionary definition of the opposite of fun), now I'm more informed about death than a person in our culture could ever expect to be under normal circumstances. For that reason, I'm deeply grateful for Caitlin and the work she does. I highly recommend this memoir-slash-philosophy opus to anyone who's ever been curious about what happens to our bodies after we die, and who the people doing it are. So good.

View all my reviews

The Mandalorian, a short review

So, The Mandalorian, maybe if I’d never seen an action movie in my life and this was my first one, I might have been a tiny, eensy bit entertained. But my godiva, I gave up after two episodes. The predictability was nauseating, and the repetition even more so. Oh look, a plot conflict. Let’s shoot at it! Oh look, another plot conflict. Let’s shoot at it! Yet a new plot conflict. Hmm, what should we do? Oh, let’s try something new. First we’ll punch it, then shoot at it! 

So yeah, I get that this is Star Wars and this guy was a bounty hunter and bounty hunters do a lot of shooting. And to be honest, I might have been able to stomach one or two more episodes of it if the writers hadn’t done something radically wrong. Well two things. First, they gave the protagonist nothing to latch on to in terms of making him the least bit either interesting or likable. He was just a laconic, faceless guy who shoots first, second, and last in every situation. In short, an impulsive, emotionally vacant psychopath. Then they made him not just dull and one-dimensional but also extremely unlikable by having him capitulate to the Jawas by heading off to kill a big, nonthreatening, rhino-type creature and steal its eggs. Did the rhino pose a threat to anyone? No. Was it planning to? No. So now the Mando is just Eric and Donald Trump Jr., going big-game hunting for sport, and not even for his own trophy but for someone else’s. Ugh. I’m really unable to get into a story where the “hero” is willing to hurt anyone or anything else for his own gain. How is that heroic? 

The last thing, and the thing most related to story craft in general, that really jumped out at me is this. One of the reasons movies and television are so popular is the visual nature of them. The Mando had a lot of great scenery (but honestly, after every other Star Wars except Empire, seeing yet another desert planet with mud and clay buildings has lost its luster)—but what it doesn’t have is a main character. It just has a guy in a mask who does things, and pretty much the same thing over and over. Part of what lets humans relate to and empathize with other humans is our highly expressive faces. We know a person’s feeling bad no matter how much they assure us they’re fine because we are brilliant at picking up on facial and body cues. A baby’s first reference in the world is its mother’s face; conversely, many people on the autism spectrum have a hard time relating to others because they don’t pick up on visual, particularly facial, cues. Therefore, it’s no stretch to recognize that it would be more of a challenge to get an audience stoked on a main character who is utterly featureless. We don’t know how he’s feeling, therefore we can’t empathize, and therefore we’re left with a monosyllabic metal-head who runs around planets killing pretty much everything for personal gain. Not exactly the recipe for heroic material, and it takes much too long to make him an interesting-ish antihero for me, at least, to give a rat’s bootie.

Not surprisingly, The Mando seems to have struck a positive note with a wide audience, many (most?) of them die-hard Star Wars fans, and that’s fine. But when you deal in story for a living, eating sleeping and breathing it, any story with such deeply rooted flaws is going to be an easy pass. There is a myriad of stories in the world that have good, interesting, even if flawed, characters who have more to offer audiences than bang-bang and brooding silence. Even the new Mad Max character played by Tom Hardy did little more than grunt his way through the movie, but at least he gave audiences a sense of his depth he showed more expressiveness than the Mando’s pure white page of nothing. Arguably, Tom Hardy’s biggest acting skill is what he does with his expressions and physicality, more than his words, but that only works because we can SEE him.


Book Review: The Twisted Ones by T. Kingfisher

The Twisted OnesThe Twisted Ones by T. Kingfisher
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Kingfisher is my new favorite author. I've been devouring her books for about a year now, and I can't get enough. Not only does she write insanely fun fantasy, but I haven't read a creepier horror novel in a decade. The Twisted Ones is not only creepy but also so much fun, with such terrific characters and narrative voice, that I lost sleep because I didn't want to stop reading it. I'm getting the Hollow Places immediately. There is just no end to Kingfisher's brilliance and panache.

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Join SF/F authors EJ Fisch, GS Jennsen, and Tammy Salyer in a virtual chat to celebrate the re-release of Forged From the Stars!

How would you like to have a chat with me and fellow Sci-Fi authors EJ Fisch and G. S. Jennsen? Guess what? We want to chat with you too, and now we can!

Join the three of us in a virtual hangout to celebrate the re-release of Forged From the Stars on September 20, at 5 p.m. PST/8 p.m. EST. Sign up here: http://www.crowdcast.io/e/live-hangoutqa-with-sci

Details:

Forged From the Stars brings you the first books in three exciting, original space opera adventure series, Ziva Payvan, my own Spectras Arise, and Aurora Rising. These epic tales feature empires that stretch across the vastness of space, suspenseful action as new worlds are discovered and old ones destroyed, thrilling interstellar warfare and deadly conspiracies that promise to reshape galaxies. 

EJ, G. S., and I will be together to chat about our inspirations, SF/F heroes, favorite wines, how many cats is too many, and anything else YOU want to know. You’re invited to join in the fun and bring your questions!

BONUS! All registrants for the event will receive a free ebook download of Forged From the Stars. We’d love to see you there!

Feel free to leave your questions or other comments for us ahead of time on our Facebook event page: https://www.facebook.com/events/8055844001843

About the Authors:

G. S. Jennsen is best known for her internationally bestselling science-fiction Amaranthe series. Based in Colorado, she has been a lawyer, a software engineer and an editor, but has found the life of a full-time author preferable by several orders of magnitude. Find G. S. at: www.gsjennsen.com and on Twitter @gsjennsen.

Southern Oregon-based author EJ Fisch is a long-time action junkie and fan of the science fiction genre. They say write what you like to read, so her Ziva Payvan series combines her two favorite genres—space opera and spy thriller—and has been lauded for its grit, compelling character development, and many twists and turns. Find EJ at: www.ejfisch.com and on Twitter @ejfisch.

Former paratrooper with the 82nd Airborne Division, Tammy Salyer traded in her M-16 for a MacBook in 1999 and hasn't regretted a thing. Her Spectras Arise series has been described as "grittier than a grunt's pile of three-week-old field gear" and her Shackled Verities fantasy series has been praised for its "compelling plot, intriguing characters and a pretty spectacular world." Find Tammy at: www.tammysalyer.com and on Twitter @tammysalyer.

Book Review: Devolution by Max Brooks

Devolution: A Firsthand Account of the Rainier Sasquatch MassacreDevolution: A Firsthand Account of the Rainier Sasquatch Massacre by Max Brooks
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Hands-down the best book I've read in 2020. I've never finished the last page of a book and considered immediately starting to re-read it, but I did with Devolution. Suspense, thrills, conspiracies, survival, horror—this book is a masterful portrait of surviving against the worst odds and the worst monsters. It's a modern-day John Carpenter's The Thing. I can't wait for a movie to be made (and I'd be shocked if one weren't already in the works). Max Brooks, please hit us with your next book in less time than what passed between World War Z and Devolution. So terrific!

Bonus: Kate Mulgrew and Nathan Fillion also appear in the audiobook.

View all my reviews

Science Fiction Adventure Storybundle, Out Now!

Hey Party People! Want a huge collection of amazing Science Fiction ebooks? I've got you covered.

Until Thursday, 9 February, Storybundle is hosting a selection of Science Fiction Adventure novels from some of the greatest SFF indie writers today. Curator, Joseph R. Lallo, has this to say about the collection:

“This is one of the biggest and best bundles we've ever put together. Oasis by New York Times Bestseller Dima Zales will blur the line of utopia and dystopia. The complete Big Sigma Series will take you blazing through the galaxy with a desperate race pilot and a quirky AI. Cyborg Legacy, the latest from the prolific and talented Lindsay Buroker is available for the first time anywhere in this bundle. Tim Ward takes the world of Hugh Howey's Sand in cinematic and thrilling new directions with Scavenger: Evolution. Tammy Salyer assembles a rugged team of space marines in Contract of Defiance and Contract of Betrayal. Geoffrey Morrison returns to his deep-sea world of devastation and decay with Undersea Atrophia, and that still only scratches the surface. We've got brilliant series-starters by Patty Jansen, M. Pax, and Joe Vasicek that are sure to hook you from the first page and never let you go. All told, that's fifteen titles from nine authors in one colossal bundle.

Every title is a cunningly woven tale of sci-fi mastery. We've got aquatic wastelands and complex time loops. There are hard-edge military stories and tales of the struggle to survive. The triumph of the human spirit, the fall of civilizations, and everything in between can all be yours. Just name your own price and dive into the action!”

The initial titles in the Sci-Fi Adventure Bundle (minimum $5 to purchase) are:

Cyborg Legacy by Lindsay Buroker

The Big Sigma Collection Volume 1 by Joseph R. Lallo

Undersea by Geoffrey Morrison

Contract of Defiance: The Spectras Arise Trilogy Book 1 by me

Shifting Reality by Patty Jansen

If you pay more than the bonus price of just $15, you get all five of the regular titles, plus EIGHT more!

Bringing Stella Home by Joe Vasicek

Temporal Contingency by Joseph R. Lallo

Undersea Atrophia by Geoffrey Morrison

Oasis by Dima Zales

Stopover at the Backworlds' Edge by M. Pax

Ambassador 1A: The Sahara Conspiracy by Patty Jansen

Contract of Betrayal: The Spectras Arise Trilogy Book 2 by me again

Scavenger: Evolution by Timothy C. Ward

This bundle is available only for a limited time via http://www.storybundle.com. It allows easy reading on computers, smartphones, and tablets as well as Kindle and other ereaders via file transfer, email, and other methods. You get multiple DRM-free formats (.epub and .mobi) for all books!For $5-$15, you can pick up over a dozen flights of fancy and lose yourself for hours.

The bundle ends 9 February, so only a few days left to pick it up, either for yourself or to gift to someone else! Just click here. Who knows, you could find your next favorite author.

Lastly, I just happen to have two free bundle download codes that I’m giving away to the first two people who can tell me the first name of my buff-as-f*ck weapons guru known in the Spectras series as Desto. If you know, shoot me an email at tammy (at) inspiredinkediting (dot) com and I’ll send you your very own free download code.

Happy reading!

Get Your Read On!

Yo Bloggolicious! Just wanted to let you know about a couple of opportunities to get your hard-core SF/F read on for zero to almost zero pennies over the next couple of days. First off, author Patty Jansen is hosting a list of over NINETY SF/F novels, of which Conviction is one, by a huge range of terrific writers. Do yourself a favor and take a look. I’m betting you’ll find so much to love you’ll be stuck in your reading nook for decades! (That’s a good thing, btw. Just make sure you bring snacks.)

And secondly, my friend and recent collaborator onForged From the Stars, G. J. Jennsen released her latest book today, Dissonance, Book 5 of the tremendously popular Aurora Rhapsody series. It’s a special day for G. S., who is one of the nicest authors I know—her birthday! Help her make it a fabulous one and buy yourself the series as a birthday present to yourself. Weird how that works, huh? I call it a win-win.

Happy reading, Bloggolites! Feel free to share the news or this post with your word-lovin' friends.

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File Under "Fury"

Yesterday was a “free” day in my life where I was way ahead on work projects and needed a break from my writing projects, so I spent the day indulging in a long run, then relaxed on the couch with my laptop ditzing around in cyberspace with movies rolling in the background. I ended up playing Mad Max: Fury Road and Aliens back to back, and it struck me how completely these two movies have embedded themselves into the deep recesses of my psyche. I’ve said many times that Aliens is my all-time favorite movie; the character of Ripley is just such a fundamental symbol of human indomitability. I didn’t expect to like Fury Road as much as I do, but after watching it again yesterday (for the *clears throat* time), it finally dawned on my that there is something unquestionably different in the making of that film that sets it apart from the usual post-apocalyptic and big-explosions fare. If the original Maxes were cult classics, Fury Road has redefined and relaunched the entire notion of what a cult classic should look like. Seriously, what an imaginative and heavy story.

And it got me to thinking about the movies that have stuck deepest and stayed longest in my brain. For the most part, they’ve all been women-led films: Aliens, Terminator 1 & 2, Fury Road, Doomsday; with a couple of outliers that include major character arcs for the female characters, even if the main role was played by a male, like: Firefly, Pitch Black, Chronicles of Riddick, Guardians of the Galaxy. (Then there are those favorites of mine that are utterly male-centric: Fight Club, There Will Be Blood, Ravenous.)

Because I have an (entirely too) orderly brain, I got to thinking: Aliens and T1 were 1986 and 1984, T2 hit in 1991, Doomsday came along in 2000, and it took till 2015 for Fury Road. That is ENTIRELY TOO FEW kickass big-screen women in over thirty years. Of course, in that time, we’ve also had Alice in Resident Evil, Selene in Underworld, but is that it?

So readers, who am I missing? What other big-screen SF/F leading ladies do I need to sink my eyeballs into to reach maximum estrogen-blasting immersion? Who are your favorites?

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New Release: Forged From The Stars, a sweeping three-book science fiction collection

Greetings Blogtastics! It's my pleasure to tell you of a new Science Fiction Adventure collection from three authors (at least one of whom you already know *wink-nudge*) out TODAY!

Announcing

FORGED FROM THE STARS

Brought to you by best-selling science fiction series authors G. S. Jennsen, E. J. Fisch, and me.

Collection Includes:

FOREWORD: S. E. Lehenbauer from

The Novel Commentary

STARSHINE: AURORA RISING BOOK ONE (Aurora Rhapsody 1) by G. S. Jennsen

DAKITI: ZIVA PAYVAN BOOK 1 by E. J. Fisch

CONTRACT OF DEFIANCE: SPECTRAS ARISE TRILOGY, BOOK 1 by Tammy Salyer

At

Amazon for Kindle

with a limited-time special release price of 99¢.

SOME WOMEN ARE CONSUMED BY THE FIRE.

SOME

BECOME

THE FIRE.

An elite operative. A war-hardened soldier. A daring explorer. One strikes from the shadows to protect a deadly secret. One strives to reclaim what was taken from her. One searches the void for the answers denied her.Their stories are their own, but they share a gritty determination to fight for what they believe in and an unwavering conviction that they can and will do whatever is necessary to save themselves, those they hold dear and, if worse comes to worst (as it always does), civilization itself.FORGED FROM THE STARS brings you the first books in three exciting, original space opera adventure series, Ziva Payvan, Spectras Arise, and Aurora Rising. These epic tales feature empires that stretch across the vastness of space, suspenseful action as new worlds are discovered and old ones destroyed, thrilling interstellar warfare and deadly conspiracies that promise to reshape galaxies.At the heart of the storm stand three women: Ziva Payvan. Aly Erikson. Alexis Solovy. Forged from the stars, in the face of overwhelming odds they will bend those stars to their will—or die trying.

HELP US GET THE WORD OUT

If you've already read any of the novels in the collection, then you know what a terrific set of books this is. Why not help us get the word out by:

  1. Sending a Tweet or ten. Here's one you can cut and paste: Three Warriors. Three Missions. Three Novels. FORGED FROM THE STARS. http://amzn.to/1nVMNIo By @EJFisch @GSJennsen @TammySalyer #scifi

  2. Leaving a review on the collection for whichever among the novels you've already read. (For instance, if you read CONTRACT OF DEFIANCE, all you have to do is cut and paste your review to the FORGED FROM THE STARS page. Easy breezy.)

  3. Sharing it on Facebook.

  4. And, obviously, getting your own copy here! http://amzn.to/1nVMNIo

Thanks Blogtastics! You're going to love this. And the best thing about it is, each of these novels is merely the first of a series.

To continue E. J. Fisch's Ziva Payvan series, pick up:

To continue G. S. Jennsen's Aurora Rising series, pick up:

WHAT I'VE BEEN UP TO

Writing. Yep, I know it's hard to believe, given how long it's been since I dropped another book. But I wrote one, and now I'm rewriting it. Because—OCD word-nerd perfectionism. I also spoke on a writing panel last weekend at the Orange County branch of the California Writers Club, and, as usual, had a blast. If you're in the SoCal region and want to have me speak for an event, I'm all over it. Just shoot me an email and we'll set it up.

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The Omnibus Has Landed

Spectras Arise Trilogy: Omnibus Edition

The trilogy became Amazon's #1 best-seller in Science Fiction Military over Memorial Day weekend. Not bad for a story that began as a humble firefight in my head while out on a run in Oregon's pouring rain about seven years ago. Thanks to all my readers who made these books a success (and who put me on the same Science Fiction best-seller page as one of my all-time favorite authors, Neal Stephenson).

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Book Review: Crime Rave by Sezín Koehler

FIVE GIANT STARS!In this dark, gritty follow-up novel to American Monsters, cutting-edge visionary Sezín Koehler brings readers back into an iconoclastic world of murder, mayhem, and revenge, where being a victim is merely a prelude to being an avenger. And what vengeance the characters who've returned from Monsters wreak! Crime Rave is not a novel to expect easy, comforting sequel-like closure from but a thrilling gut-punch to the psyche that'll keep you simultaneously hungry for justice and spooked about just what that might mean. If you like your morning coffee with a shot of whiskey and a filterless cigarette Irvine Welsh-style, you'll want to add Crime Rave to the alchemy.And don't forget to pick up your copy of the incredible prelude to Crime Rave, American Monsters. Here's my review.

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Movie Review: October Movie Roundup and Guns, Guns, Guns, No Funs!

I binged hardcore this month—the month it seems like I've been waiting all year for—and went to all the films I most wanted to see. Included in the list are: Sicario, The Martian, Crimson Peak, and The Last Witch Hunter.

If you know me, you would expect the one I'd pick if I had to pick one to recommend everyone go see would be Crimson Peak. Of course, this would only be natural. I think Guillermo del Toro has the greatest vision and quirky storytelling style of any contemporary director/writer in his class right now, even better and more exciting than Peter Jackson's, Jerry Bruckheimer's, or Joss Whedon's. He brings monsters and stories to life on the screen so beautifully and vibrantly that you can only sit back and absorb his epics and instantly watch them a second time afterward to relive all the elegance and moments you might have missed.

You'd think my pick would be Crimson Peak, but this time you'd be wrong. For once, GdT's vision became a little overburdened, in my opinion, by his movie's simplistic story and stifling set. Yes, the movie was about a specific manor and the events that transpired there in the late 1800s, but because of this, audiences weren't treated to the grander scope of place and story that usually typify his movies. After 2013's Mama, a GdT haunted-house story doesn't have quite the same impact as it might have, regardless of the quality of acting by the main characters (which was wonderful, particularly Jessica Chastain's, which was marvelous!). However, this was the only one of the four that excelled in passage of the Bechdel Test.

If I had to pick one to laud without reservation, (and because I'm too nice to make you read this whole post to find out the best of them) it would be Sicario. This film is a study in building tension and excitement. Unlike most films, The Martian for example, you can't quite be sure from one scene to the next what the movie's ultimate climax will be, but there are plenty of breadcrumbs to keep you riveted to the trail along the way. Benecio del Toro is a master at understated intensity, and Emily Blunt absolutely knows how to carry a dramatic role without being in the slightest melodramatic. This film is 5-plus stars without question. Failed the Bechdel Test however.

The Martian lived up to the hype, but I don't think you can get Matt Damon in a movie without it being an automatic hype machine. (We'll just pretend Elysium never happened.) While nothing in it surprised me, even though I haven't read the novel, and every turn was predictable to the point of being cliché, it still had enough hero appeal to make an audience root for the movie's namesake. Nope on the Bechdel Test, but that's not surprising given it being a high-budget male-main-character film. Shitty, but true.

And finally, The Last Witch Hunter. Not quite there when compared to the Riddick series, but fun and light nonetheless. Both An Aging Hipster and I were surprised by the slower pace of the story itself, yet we were still entertained by its lack of campiness and better plot development than expected. The costumes and CG were fun, but overall, this one is definitely best rented on a night when the cheaper IPA and $2 bottle of wine are flowing freely. Vin smiles a lot, which surprised me. Bechdel Test fail.

Now we get to the substantive part of these overall reviews. For those who don't care about social commentary, this is where you may bow out. I'm going to recap the events surrounding our viewing of The Last Witch Hunter, which added a shocking and unfortunate turn to the experience. No matter how you feel about guns and the right to bear arms, here is the result of living in a country where gun ownership prevails.

File this story under "gut check." Before the lights dimmed as we sat in last night's theater, I observed a solo white man in a hooded sweatshirt, baseball cap, and sunglasses (in a dark theater) walk up the aisle and stand awkwardly in the row for a while before finally taking a seat. Oh, and he was carrying a heavy-looking black backpack. An Aging Hipster and I have started sitting in the back row at theaters because…well…we like to keep an eye on things. I pointed this strange-looking and strange-acting dude out to Hip, and we both couldn't help but stare at him until he settled in and a pulled a large bag of chips from the backpack. Okay, we thought, just a guy having a picnic at the movie. And yet…

After the film ended, we left the theater behind this guy and a another couple. The three of them were in some kind of heated exchange, but I wasn't sure over what. It seems one may have bumped into another. It quickly escalated to the point that when we reached the exit, both the freaky dude and the man he was in an argument with stopped and wouldn't go through. It was a standoff. Rage was flying. The next thing that happened is the freaky dude says he's not going out first, he's not going to walk in front of the other man, and that he was going to "put something in the back of his head." He then unshouldered his backpack and reached to unzip it. Hip and I squeezed out, and he urgently asked the counter staff (in his drill sergeant's voice, which is formidable) to call security. The kid at the counter stared at Hip blankly, as if he'd spoken in Klingon. Hip repeated himself, and asked if they even had security. The kid said no. Mind you, I've had my bag searched twice by the ticket takers at this theater, yet still they had no security. Um…? Last night, however, no bags were searched.

Within another couple of minutes, the man whose life had just been threatened and his girlfriend finally managed to ease past the crazy, yelling, threatening dude to the parking lot. Crazy dude followed them out, still yelling, and then continued to rant like a madman long after they were no longer in sight. Jeff and I could still hear him when we got to our car.

My instincts knew this dude was off the second I laid eyes on him. People: ALWAYS listen to your gut. This is America, home of the mentally ill gun-toting crowd that only gets worse with each passing year. It grieves me that even the act of going to see a Vin Diesel movie requires such intense situational awareness that I now sit in the back row to avoid getting shot from behind and spend the previews not looking forward to new films, but analyzing the other people at the theater, wondering which one might pull a weapon and where their blindspot might be in case they need to be tackled. What the fuck? As the Jello Biafra and Guantanomo School of Medicine song says, "When you jump at the sight of your neighbor, arm yourselves against them instead. Stiffened up like a porcupine, welcome to Panic Land."

At what point do we recognize that there is a sickness in a society where one has to measure the risk of getting shot against the decision to do such basic things as go to school or the theater? The question I keep struggling with is what I as an individual can possibly do about such an endemic and multifaceted problem, which is only exacerbated by the conflicting agendas of personal rights vs. making responsible social agreements and laws. It's so easy in the movies to beat the villain and live happily ever after. Maybe that's why we sometimes prefer our fantasy worlds to these more and more frequent examples of what our real lives in American are becoming.

PS: I'm not actually proposing we all arm ourselves. I'm pointing out that's where we're headed. Imagine your next Sunday outing:

"Well, dear, do you think we should take the Sigs with us?"

"No, dear. Don't be absurd. You know the theater is going to be filled to capacity! Damon's latest Oscar is sure to draw the crowds. We should take the ARs. We might have to lay down a heavy suppressive fire to get clear should anyone lose their shit."

"You're right, of course, dear. I'll go grab some extra magazines."

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Crowdfunding Pro-tips by speculative fiction author C. J. Pitchford

Thanks very much to Chris Pitchford for guesting on my blog today. Chris and I go back a few years, originally meeting in 2012 at the Rocky Mountain Fiction Writers Conference in Denver. It was a wonderful conference, of course made even better by making new writing buddies! Chris has some great info to share on crowdfunding novels as an indie author. Read on.

* * *

Thanks to the wonderful hostess with the mostest, Tammy Salyer, for graciously allowing me to unceremoniously scribble all over her blog. And thanks also to you, dear reader! For what? Read on and find out!

But first I’m going to tell you how this is going to work.You see, a year ago I self-published the first book in my historical fantasy series, The Agility of Clouds. And I was desperate. I had no experience—and worse—no idea how I going to market my darling story of the time-slipping Marchioness of Cambridgeshire.So I tried something new (to me): crowdsourcing the marketing at this site called ‘Kickstarter.’ I signed up, created a project along with a video and—not to put too fine a point on it—went crazy launching my book. The result is still available here.Kickstarter is home to all sorts of projects. And, like the name implies, starts the ball rolling in terms of funding and marketing of said projects, games, books, movies, even 3D printing pens (whatever those are). Funding is used for manufacturing, printing, distribution and postage among other things—but not, apparently, living expenses (as seen here).By now you have probably gotten so over the whole Kickstarter thing (captured in the spirit of the times in this ancient Gawker blog post).But let’s move past the parentheticals and talk about me. Specifically, I had already written a novel. It was done. The illustrator illustrated and the editor edited, and they—along with Bowker and the Library of Congress—had all been paid. I formatted the work, wrapped it up in a pretty cover and even got a wonderful blurb from a lovely and talented author. Because it was all done, I didn’t need a starter, but I wanted—desperately, remember—to crowdsource the marketing. I needed to get new ideas, and sought the wisdom of the crowd to learn where I should focus my limited advertising budget.And by that criteria, I failed utterly.Oh, sure. The modest Kickstarter—or, kicklauncher, as I called it—was successfully funded. But no one knows how to independently market new books online. I’m sure you know, regardless of which market, that the fundamentals still and probably always will apply. ‘Word of mouth’ advertising is king and queen; you must keep on your toes by networking; and, my favorite of all fundamentals is pure marketingsauce, ‘fake it ’til you make it.’ But in my Kickstarter, there was no magic or special sauce, and the pursuit of online Virality™ is both ongoing and a neologism.Before I write another word about crowdfunding I must warn you—money is involved. I know. The jaded intelligentsia can just skip this paragraph, of course. For the rest of us? Please don’t do anything online you don’t feel comfortable doing. Also, educate yourself! There are some terrible ideas out there—if someone is promising something that breaks the laws of physics, it’s probably a scam. I mean, I can break the laws of physics all the time—in my stories when I’m writing, that is. But here are some of the worst ideas. (For an overview of criticism about the Kickstarter concept, check out this.)Do you see where I’m going with this? Because I’m a writer, and therefore by definition, a glutton for punishment, I’m doing it all again. I’m crowdfunding my newest book, an adult sci-fi novel where an asteroid miner survives galactic civil war using the life lessons of politically incorrect comic characters, Gung Ho and Little Pluck.But this one’s different. And by different I don’t mean just a different genre and style. I’m trying a site called Inkshares, which does more than just funnel money (although I suppose it does that, too). The website only supports projects that result in books, and actually publishes projects that are successfully funded. I created a project and entered it into The Nerdist Collection Competition, where the top five projects—ranked by number of pre-orders—will be published whether they are funded successfully or not.Here’s the link and I want to thank you for reading, and for checking out my latest attempt at marketing! See? This is how crowdsourcing works—I think. Let me know in the comments below!About the author: C. J. Pitchford (go ahead and call him ‘Chris’—just don’t call him during dinner, it’s a blood sugar thing) lives in Denver, Colorado and once tried to save the world using an almost magical ability to program computers, phones and tablets. He is also the author of the paranormal historical fantasy series, THE HELLEBORINE CHRONICLES, available on Amazon and iTunes.

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Some Days, the Bear Eats You

You just finished that latest novel that’s been burning a hole in your brain for the last six months. You toss off the final “the end,” leave it in the virtual drawer for a couple of weeks (or hours), and then go back, look it over, analyze your flaws and errors, plot, characters, word choices, conflicts, all of it. And finally, after draft two (or ten), you think it’s time to send it out to some first readers. And you wait.And then…no one likes it.That’s right. You sit yourself down, look at all your readers’ notes and feedback and desperate attempts not to crush your spirit, and you finally have to face reality. Your book sucks, it’s boring, it doesn’t make sense, and for godiva’s sake, why are there yetis in space?—or put another way, some days you eat the bear, and some days the bear eats you.So then what? Do you cry, moan, doubt yourself, realize that your dream of being a novelist is akin to dreaming of growing up to be Darth Vader, but with a less vaginal-looking helmet? Do you forsake your inner voice and promise to never again write a word in fun? From here on out, technical manuals only, period, the end.Or do you smile and swallow that delicious, perfectly baked humble pie made especially for you, and think about just how fantastically grateful you are? Grateful, you say, but why? Because, think about it—writing is fun! Because now you know without a shadow of a doubt not only that your book is indeed imperfect, but also why. And guess what? You now have everything you need to jump back into that marvelous mess you’ve created and do more of what you love. You were given permission, nay, encouragement to go back to the playground and play yourself silly. You, my friend, get to keep writing, and that’s exactly what you wanted all along. Hooray, Writer!And that bear that’s been nibbling on you? That guy is just your inner voice, reminding you that no one gets it right all the time, and showing a little backbone and tenacity is what makes you better than you were. Instead of being eaten by the bear, you are the bear.Now go out and roar.

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Spreading the Writing Bug

Greetings Blogglings!One of the great things about being a writer is being part of a large neurotic community of like-minded creative spirits. Despite this Borgishness, however, we still somehow often find ourselves withdrawn and closeted for days, weeks, months? on end, eyeball deep in our next work-in-progress, forgetting to feed our bodies, and even sometimes forgetting to feed our innate need for community and interaction with others of our kind. Many great writing bloggers talk about how important it is to care for ourselves, no matter how hot the fires of creativity are burning, and one of those necessary nourishments is a rubbing of elbows with friends and family, and definitely more writers.Which is why I was so thrilled to be invited by creative mastermind Kevin Staniec, cofounder of the 1888 Center, to speak at the Book Carnival in Orange, CA last month on a panel about the Elements of Genre. Not only was it an excuse to leave my writing cave, but also a chance to share stories and experiences with more folks in the biz and talk a bit about my own writing journey with other curious and interested writers. Talk about a love fest! Other members of the panel included Jon-Barrett Ingels, our moderator, who is also a novelist with Blackhill Press and podcaster of The How They Why fame, both extensions of the hydra that is 1888 Center. Author Kate St. Clair was there to talk about her award-winning YA paranormal novel series (including Spelled, and Cursed). And Martin Lastrapes (author of award-winning Inside the Outside and the recent The Vampire, the Hunter, and the Girl) rounded out the panel with his brilliant and witty insights into becoming, to his great surprise, a horror author. (PS: You might remember when Martin and I got together late last year to swoon over Tom Robbins and writing at his great writing show, The Martin Lastrapes Podcast Hour, too.)If I had to choose two words as my takeaway from the experience of panel speaking to share with other authors, they would be: DO. THIS.This fun, mutually enlightening, and educational-without-being-dry adventure does magic for reinvigorating the writing spirit, filling up the well of inspiration, and being just plain good times. When you have an hour or so, give the podcast a listen to see what I mean. While you're at it, check out the tons of other great guests The How The Why has hosted (I'm currently listening to show 71 featuring Sophie Werely, editor of Shimmer Magazine). You'll come away fully recharged and ready to tackle any new, old, or beckoning writing project.I plan to spend some of my writing time each month into finding new ways to share the joys of writing, and I highly recommend other authors do the same. Look for conventions in your area, or even just get a local group of writing friends together to discuss a writing-related topic and find a bookstore that's willing to host you for an hour. It's a win-win for bookstores and authors—they get to engage and entertain their customers, and you get to talk about doing what you love.If you've been a panelist before, please feel free to share in the comments what your experiences have been and whether you would do it again. And if you're in Southern California, look me up! I'd love to get together over coffee or tea and word-nerd out with you anytime.Cheers!

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Summer Writing Program and Latest News

Greets Bloggoradicals! ’Sup y’all? I know it’s been ages since I dipped my digital quill into the blogoverse, but I have real reasons. Top of the list is that the Amazing Hip and I are buying a condo (because when you live in Orange County that’s what you do!). In short, it’s been a bit of a nightmare, but that’s a long story best told over a pint or five of barleywine. Besides that, I’ve been doing some heavy editing for a series of chick-lit novels coming out sometime next year. The lovely author is English, and I have been having the time of my life honing up on my British slang and speech, and I already feel smarter for it. Because, of course, adding a British accent to anything automatically ups the intellect quotient by a factor of ten, amiright?In Spectras news, the Spectras Arise Trilogy: Omnibus Edition did this crazy thing last month and hit Amazon's Bestseller List for Science Fiction, Galactic Empire. HOLY! I can't tell you what a rush it is to see something like that. It's a total Sally Fields moment, you know?In other news, my latest novel is out to beta readers, and so far the feedback has been good. Which excites me no end—I really went off my usual game with how I crafted this one, so am radically removed from any objectivity over how good (or, let's face it, bad) it might be. I’ll let you know more about it when the subsequent novels in the new series are closer to fruition. Things are a bit behind at the moment thanks to the whole nightmare house-purchasing thing. (Did you know that living out of boxes is quite the creativity killer? True fact.)And finally, I’ll be participating in a panel at the Book Carnival bookstore in Orange on June 27 called The Elements of Genre with authors Martin Lastrapes and Kate St. Clair. The panel is part of the larger Summer Writing Project put on by Black Hill Press, JukePop, and 1888. Here’s a bit more about it from the project website.

Both Black Hill Press and JukePop champion two abandoned mediums. Black Hill Press fights for the novella—a distinctive, often overlooked literary form that offers the focus of a short story and the scope of a novel, while JukePop is rejuvenating the lost art of the serial, pioneered at the dawn of publishing, when authors such as Charles Dickens received critical acclaim and feedback from mass audiences by serializing novels one chapter at a time.This joint venture presents authors with the opportunity to craft their novellas one chapter at a time with immediate quantitative and qualitative feedback from their readers, while also broadcasting their words to an audience eager for the next great storyteller.Throughout the months of June, July, and August, we partner with local bookstores, libraries, and universities to schedule a series of educational lectures, panels, and workshops for the community.Summer Writing Project 2015 begins on June 1 and continues through August 31.

If you’re a SoCal writer, come say hi! The panel series has something for every kind of writer and promises to be a great time for all.So that’s about it. I’ll be falling off the edge of the world again this week as we move to our new house and settle in.PS: Look forward to a bunch of cat pictures in the coming months—because you can’t buy a new condo without populating it with a new furball. I know, I know, you can’t wait, can you?

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Uptalking Writing with Horror Author Martin Lastrapes

Greets Bloggolicious!

Here's some really cool news. In December, the wonderfully warm, friendly, and talented best-selling indie author Martin Lastrapes invited me to be a guest on his show, The Martin Lastrapes Show. And what a show it was! So fun! I was tickled to visit Martin in his studio and gab for a couple of hours about that thing we all love: writing. I encourage you all to come listen and leave some comments about your thoughts. Admittedly, Martin and I were all over the place with topics, ranging from how we got started in the world of writing, to how authors develop a voice, to what's so intrinsically amazing about Tom Robbins, to marketing, editing, and essentials of cover art for indie authors. This is a show that promises to leave very few stones unturned. And for those we missed, Martin and I have plans to do some more stone flipping in the future. Visit the show and, again, feel free to leave comments and share your thoughts, expertise, and experiences. We'd both love to hear from you!

Listen and subscribe at Martin's show link, Stitcher, iTunes, or right here on Lybsyn.

Now it's time to get serious. It's okay—it shouldn't hurt…much.

Have you ever had that disconcerting moment when you're exposed to a recording or an image of yourself unexpectedly and thought, "Who in hell is this alien-like doppelgänger acting as if she's me? Do I really sound/look like that?"

Fun fact: I'm a feminist, which is to say I spend a lot of time thinking about how women and men harmonize—or don't—in our shared paradigm. (That's the paradigm of being respiring mammals roaming the earth simultaneously and trying to refrain from destroying each other or it, while still enjoying equal access to the great stuff we find here, like coconuts and scotch).

What do these two things have to do first with each other and secondly with Martin's show? This: Are you familiar with the term "uptalk" also known as "upspeak"? In brief, it's that strange vocal lilt some people end spoken sentences with, where their voice rises as if asking a question, even with completely non-questiony statements like "Hi. My name is Tammy." But in upspeak, it sounds like, "Hi. My name is Tammy?" Speaking this way tends to make a person sound uncertain of what they've said, or apologetic, or expectant of being and willing to be contradicted. There's been a good deal of discussion and research on this phenomenon, which is a characteristic frequently attributed to women, who are socialized to defer to others (usually men). What's so weird about it is that it sounds like a tacit admission of the possibility of being incorrect—even about one's own name! Freakishly bizarre and undermining, this habit, at least I've long thought so.

And guess what? After listening to my chat with Martin, I appear to have won a blue ribbon at the Uptalk Lingual Faire. (Cue immature laughter over the phrase "lingual faire.") Winning? Um…

You can probably imagine my horrified surprise at learning that I have not only a mild propensity for but a raging linguistic habit of uptalk. I was shocked! Bewildered! Embarrassed! I mean, I don't need people to listen to me and think, "Ah, there's woman whose authority on subject X would stop even Ghengis Khan in his tracks." But, dae-um, I at least try to sound like I know what I'm talking about. Because I do. Really. You know, most of the time.

Thanks to this horrifying revelation, my sudden self-consciousness, as well as incurable curiosity (a.k.a. nerdiness), led me on a paranoid dash to the googles in order to learn more. What I discovered was actually not what I expected (and hugely reassuring). Wait, did that last sentence sound like clickbait? Oh well…moving on.

Turns out that, while there is a lot of talk (get it, talk?) about how upspeak is essentially self-negating, there is no actual evidence that this is the case. What's that song? Birds do it, bees do, even monkeys in the trees do it? So, yeah, it's just a thing a great number of people do. Enough so that it's become a cultural norm, not something that confirms or denies a person's innate expertise or confidence on a given matter.

This Bloomberg article describes succinctly where this unnecessary self-consciousness came from, specifically with this statement:

The lilt is still widely considered a signifier of girlish insecurity and ditziness. Anne Charity Hudley, a linguist at William & Mary, offers a possible reason for this. “When certain linguistic traits are tied to women … they often will be assigned a negative attribute without any actual evidence,” she says.

This article by activist Marybeth Seitz-Brown at Slate confirms this.

But the funny thing is, uptalk isn't actually just used by the young and female. When you’re on the lookout for it, you’ll hear uptalk from people of many demographics. Yet I’ve never heard anyone condemn New Zealanders’ speech for not being authoritative or confident enough, despite their rampant use of uptalk at all ages and genders. I also hear many men, including former President George W. Bush, using uptalk, and have yet to hear any of them be chastised for not sounding authoritative enough. In fact, there's no conclusive evidence that women even use uptalk more than men.

If you've stuck with me this far, I highly recommend reading the two articles above. You will never listen to a conversation the same way again! (I know, I know, overanalyze much?) To sum up, what I've always subconsciously assumed—that uptalk is an automatic self-negation of one's own point of view—is really nothing more than a widespread, learned cultural trait, a meme if you will, that has been misattributed as a "girlie" habit. Phew!

And there you have it. If you, like me, are unusually attuned to words in all their forms, from spoken to written to sung to signed, and tend to notice the way they're presented a little more acutely than the average person (because you're a writer and you simply can't help having a bit of savantism about language), you can rest and read easy knowing that uptalk is nothing to fear, nothing to hide from, nothing to be embarrassed of, and most importantly, not an indication that you nothing meaningful to say.

PS: For the curious, I have more, yes, much more to say about language in this post here.

Announcement: Martin's first novel, Inside the Outside, was an Amazon best-seller in horror and won the grand prize in the 2012 Paris Book Festival. His newest best-seller, The Vampire, the Hunter, and the Girl just came out. Lovers of paranormal and horror, these are both shoe-ins for date night with a novel. I heartily encourage you to check them out!

Enjoy what you've seen so far? Click the follow button or enter your email to subscribe to new posts. Bonus snark to joiners of the newsletter tribe, who get my novel news, including the first look at new stories and invitations to join contests and giveaways. Thank you!

Feeding the ThinkBeast

I hit a milestone last night and finished my fourth novel (happy happy, joy joy). This newest is significant for a number of reasons. First, it’s the first novel I’ve started and finished in less than about a year. I penned the first words last November, got about 25K in, then stopped for a month and wrote the outline.

That’s milestone number two: this is the first novel I actually plotted start to finish before getting too deep in to back out and rework significant parts. And, as incredible as it may sound, this actually worked! Once the outline was done, the book came together in three short months (with many deviations from the original projection, naturally, but still with minimal fits and starts, as was usual).

The third milestone is that this is my first (completed) fantasy novel—though I have my share of started-and-abandonded fantasy stories clogging my hard drive, but don’t we all.

And finally, this book was just feckin’ fun to write! This is the first novel I’ve done where I wasn’t having to bribe, threaten, and coerce myself to get to the keyboard some days and put down new words. It was a nonstop funfest from prologue to epilogue, and I am monumentally excited about it!

Lots to do before this opus is ready for the world, not least of which is to finish the outlines for the subsequent two novels (this is book one of a trilogy). I also have the sticky wicket of an issue of deciding on a title, a notoriously difficult thing for me, and writing the blurb, which is always a task I love doing. And of course, many, many edits, beta rounds, critiques, and proofreading to be done, along with commissioning cover art. But I’m still thrilled, not even close to overwhelmed, and bouncing-off-the-walls excited about spending more time with this cadre of quirky and crazy characters.

This writing thing—it's really neato.

Thought I’d share with you all the main ingredient that is part of every writing and editing session I commence. Music. The food that feeds the muse and the mind, aka the ThinkBeast. Several albums spun round on repeat on Grooveshark and my sweetie and my shared iTunes library during the creation of this novel. Like a drug that runs throught one’s veins, music tends to leave its mark on writing, I think, and subtly, and sometimes not subtly, contribute to the tone of the words you write. So here’s my list; perhaps you’ll find on it music to inspire your own writing or art-of-choice projects.

Stoa — everythingDiary of Dreams — everythingKilling Joke — mostly 2003, Absolute Dissent, and Extremities, Dirt and Repressed EmotionsTrevor Morris — Vikings soundtrackClint Mansell —Doom and Requiem for a Dream soundtracksJohn Murphy — Sunshine and 28 Days Later soundtracksTyler Bates —300 soundtrackTwo Steps From Hell — mostly Skyworld and SolarisWilliam Control — mostly Noir, Beautiful Losers, and Hate CultureJunkie XL — 300: Rise of an Empire soundtrack

There are lots of others, but these few were played nearly everyday. Though there’s quite a bit of moody, gothy, dark-wavey stuff in there, I swear the book has lots of moments of light and laughter! Pinkie swear.

Let's hear from you. What do you like to listen to when you're writing?

Happy listening, and especially happy writing, y'all!!!

Enjoy what you've seen so far? Click the follow button or enter your email to subscribe to new posts. Bonus snark to joiners of the newsletter tribe, who get my novel news, including the first look at new stories and invitations to join contests and giveaways. Thank you!

I Have a Story On the Moon, aka, Luna Station Quarterly

Greetings Blogolotticans!Just a quick announcement that I have a new-slash-old story out in print today with the intrepid Luna Station Quarterly magazine. The story, "Indulgence," was originally released in my four twisted tales of love and lust collection, On Hearts and Scorpions, back in 2012 (the first collection I ever indie published, as a matter of fact. How special! This is the third story in the collection that has also been published in other literary mags. Yay me!). Now, here it is in all its glory with LSQ, a speculative fiction magazine featuring stories by emerging women authors.And even more exciting, this is their first ever printed volume, so they're offering a a ten percent discount. Get more info here, and don't miss out on these fun new stories by some more badass authors. You can also buy direct from Amazon.If you pick up the magazine and enjoy "Indulgence," don't hesitate to let me know. I'll even send you a free review copy of On Hearts on Scorpions. How's that for helping you stock up on reading material?Cheers and happy reading!